Think back to the last time you got triggered and your emotions went from zero to one hundred in an instant. What happened?

The more important question is: How did it make you feel?

Maybe you lost your temper because your partner added another dish to the sink instead of cleaning it. Or a colleague spoke over you… again. Or someone cut you off in traffic and suddenly you were laying on the horn and yelling.

Whatever it was—what did you make it mean?

I was recently on a call with a highly successful businessman who was struggling. Just moments before our meeting, a client spoke down to him. By the time we connected, he had a vein bulging on his forehead, still justifying why he had lost his temper.

I interrupted him with a question:

"Can a single paper cut kill you?"

He looked puzzled, then replied, “No.”

"But does it hurt?"

“Of course—it stings.”

We both laughed, because we all know the sharp little burn of a paper cut. Harmless, yet annoyingly painful.

I explained that the first time he felt disrespected in his life, it was like receiving a single paper cut. But every time he experienced that same feeling afterward, it was like slicing the same spot again and again. One cut isn’t fatal, but when layered over time, the wound becomes raw, exasperated, and explosive.

So when his client disrespected him, his reaction wasn’t to just that moment—it was to every past moment his body remembered. His brain pulled up old memories, released a flood of chemicals into his body, and produced an emotional reaction far bigger than the situation itself.

That realization helped him calm down.

THE LESSON?

Your triggers often have very little to do with the person or situation in front of you. They are echoes of the past. If you want to free yourself, you must become aware of the pattern.

THE EXERCISE: Releasing a Trigger

1. Pause & Breathe – When you feel triggered, stop. Take three slow breaths to disrupt the unconscious loop.
2. Name the Emotion – Ask yourself: What am I really feeling? (e.g., disrespected, unseen, unsafe, unloved).
3. Trace It Back – Ask: When else have I felt this way? Recall the earliest memory if you can. Notice how the wound has been cut again and again.
4. Release the Charge – Place your hand on your heart. Say: “This is an old wound. I see it. I release the weight of the past. This moment does not define me.” Breathe deeply and imagine the energy leaving your body.
5. Re-anchor – Choose a new state. Smile, stand tall, or say: “I am safe. I am powerful. I respond with presence.”

Practice this often, and you’ll notice the sting of those paper cuts fade. Instead of bleeding from old wounds, you’ll meet life from a grounded, empowered place.

Remember: Your triggers aren’t here to punish you. They’re here to point you toward the healing that’s ready to happen.